Trinity

Mazzy is currently pulling up on my swiveling chair and letting out various "power yells" as she does it. She is fascinating to me. I appreciate every aspect of her personality, even if I don't always appreciate her timing.

My thoughts are in turmoil. It seems that they are too often a mess inside my head, fighting to make sense. I could be depressed, but I am nervous about that 'diagnosis.' Depression is dark and heavy, laying itself across my heart and mind like a plague of ick. I have been depressed and I didn't bounce back. I don't want this to be that, you know?

I am back at work, part-time, because, like the rest of you, my little family struggles with money. Our essential needs are met, but I am materialistic and I would like to wear more than one pair of blue jeans. I was getting by on my maternity clothes, but I have to give them away.....

Stefanie is pregnant. We haven't told our mother-in-law, yet, because her husband, my brother-in-law, is still processing the fact that he knocked up his wife. Again. Without meaning to.

I worry about what this pregnancy will mean for our family dynamic. Does that change their leaving date? Not that they had much of a date anyway. I am not angry, nor am I terriblely compelled to talk about all day and all night, but I did rant a little last night. I don't understand. They are living with family because they aren't able to afford to live on their own, so they make another baby?

Whatever. We will make things work. I am sure.