Take Three

Last week I managed to get in to the optometrist to have my eyes checked. It is only three years overdue. Ha. At any rate, I also picked out new glasses. They have been ordered, but with the holiday, I don't expect to see them before next week. Bummer. They should look pretty sweet. Well, and pretty similar to these bad boys, but in brown and turquoise. Jealous? Just you wait. I am going to be one hot piece of ass.




Here is a picture of Hermione. No reason, just thought I should remind you that I have a dog and that I do get her groomed. Doesn't she look adorable? You know, for a small dog. Also, the grooming thing reminded me of a story. Skip to the end if you want to read about the douchey thing I did this week.




This is a picture of the not-so-delicate remains of a Olee's burger basket special. Two fully loaded bacon and cheese burgers with two fries and a drink for under seven dollars. Local food rules!

As for the rest of my life, I don't have pictures. I have one great story. Well, it was great for me. WAAAAYYYYYYY back in the Time Before Marriage, I worked at a pet food and grooming place in one of the wealthier suburbs in our area. This is valid to the story because I was there picking Hermione and BB up after being groomed on Tuesday of this week. While I was there I got to have one of the single most liberating experiences for anyone who has ever worked in retail. I was standing at the counter waiting on the employees to bring my dogs up to the counter when a woman walked in to the store. She looks at me, and says, "Andy Cook."

"Okay," I reply, smiling. We both stand, staring at one another, a bit uncomfortably.

"Andy Cook." The woman just stares at me after repeating herself, looking annoyed.

"Fantastic." This time my reply was a bit cheekier than before. I could tell that she thought I worked there, but I didn't want to make it easy on her. Yes, I am an asshole.

"Aren't you going to go get my dog?" She is openly glaring at me. She even uses one hand to gesture to the back room where they keep the groomed dogs. I just smile at her. "My dog is in the back."

"I gathered. My dogs are in the back, too." I am casually leaning against the counter, smiling openly at the woman, now.

"You don't work here?"

"No."

"I could have sworn..." She looks really confused.

"Nope."

"Are you sure?"

"Are you really pursuing this?"

About this time two employees, arms filled with wriggling, excited puppy butt, come out of the back. I grab my dogs and walk out to the car.

It wasn't a full-on "Are you stupid?" conversation, but it still felt damn good. I like being able to tell people, "No." Admittedly, I am not often given the opportunity, but that afternoon got me through the rest of the week. Whee.