Little drops of nothing
June. It's a weird month. It's already too hot to tolerate, but it isn't even the peak heat season. We started Hurricane Watch and with the oil slick/leak/disaster in the Gulf, all I can think about is raining oil. I've been watching the news, but they haven't assuaged my fears about the oil getting in to the water table, either. It's probably stupid, science was so long ago I've forgotten the specifics, but it's possible, right? Maybe?
Anyway, my crazy brain keeps racking up the Uponacalypse (It's a phrase Adam and I use because the Apocalypse is Upon us. Get it?) points and every little thing makes me go Old School. Like, at any moment we're all going to die. Only, logically, I know that it would be this slow death and no one thing will off us.
Happy thoughts.
Other than that, things are good. I'm stronger than I've been in a long time. Probably longer than I remember, if I'm honest. I found something within myself that is really working in a fantastic way. I'm already seeing a difference in my relationships. It's a positive thing. I'm not as easily walked on. I've stood up for myself in the last two weeks, something I wouldn't have done before. I'm feeling good about it.
I've got a doctor's appointment next Thursday and I need to plan a blood panel, but I'm notorious about avoiding what they're bound to tell me. I'll get brave, one day. I just get so worked up about what my blood is keeping from me. Like, my whole body has secrets and knowing the secret will change everything. The doctor may order a panel all on her own. I'll deal with that.
All of this Summer Showers business is making the dog nervous. I guess I should pop in my Leverage Season 2 DVD and let her curl up under the blanket with me until this passes.
Anyway, my crazy brain keeps racking up the Uponacalypse (It's a phrase Adam and I use because the Apocalypse is Upon us. Get it?) points and every little thing makes me go Old School. Like, at any moment we're all going to die. Only, logically, I know that it would be this slow death and no one thing will off us.
Happy thoughts.
Other than that, things are good. I'm stronger than I've been in a long time. Probably longer than I remember, if I'm honest. I found something within myself that is really working in a fantastic way. I'm already seeing a difference in my relationships. It's a positive thing. I'm not as easily walked on. I've stood up for myself in the last two weeks, something I wouldn't have done before. I'm feeling good about it.
I've got a doctor's appointment next Thursday and I need to plan a blood panel, but I'm notorious about avoiding what they're bound to tell me. I'll get brave, one day. I just get so worked up about what my blood is keeping from me. Like, my whole body has secrets and knowing the secret will change everything. The doctor may order a panel all on her own. I'll deal with that.
All of this Summer Showers business is making the dog nervous. I guess I should pop in my Leverage Season 2 DVD and let her curl up under the blanket with me until this passes.
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