Leftover sleepy

I'm almost a week away from surgery and I'm feeling great. Mid-day is my enemy and I've given in to the urge to nap on several occasions, but today I'm attempting to fight it. It's no surprise that I'm eager to return to my old routine, my previous energy, with the added bonus of my renewed emotional vigor.

Surgery itself was easy and quick, if Adam is to be believed. I was still out of it pos-op, so my doctor skipped speaking to me at all and gave Adam all of the pertinent information in the waiting room. She was able to drain the offending cyst as well as laser off the bits of endometriosis she was able to find. From what Google has told me, my follow-up appointment will be full of educational information about the grading of my endometriosis and a game plan for keeping it from spreading too quickly and causing me pain, again. I already feel better than I've felt in months and I just has surgery. What does that say about the state of my daily pain?

Nora has been sweet, being extra careful with my "owies." Perversely, she can't seem to stop looking at them. She's interested in the discoloration and the healing process in general. She likes to hover her fingers over the incisions and say, "Careful." She's offered, a few times, to kiss my boo-boos, but I've declined, opting for delightfully healing hugs instead. My inability to give her "uppies" has been the bane of her toddler existence. We've compromised and I crouch down, swaying back and forth with her until she grows tired of my desperate sniffing in her hair. I'm an addict and I miss that "new baby" smell. She misses her mentally stable mother. Ha.

The unintended consequence of the removal my endometriosis is the revival of my waning fertility - there's a good chance that all of the time that it took to get pregnant with Nora was due to rogue tissue growing all willy-nilly on my lady parts and with it's absence whatever little saftey net I had of getting rummed up and forgetting protection is now out the window. What does that even mean for our sex life? How will that change how we approach things? Despite having miserable luck with birth control in the past, will I now have to keep trying until we find something that works for me so that we, like most people, actually protect ourselves against accidental pregnancy?

Does this mean that I have to have the conversation with Adam, again, about any future offspring?

We shelved the idea because of money and increasing age and the fact that getting pregnant takes us so bloody long, but will this change that? Could we actually wait another few years, become more financially stable, and still have time for another child? Like normal people?

Happily I can put my head in the sand for a while longer before I have to make any decisions. I'll see my doc for a follow-up and, once I know what's going on with me, I'll make a better informed choice. I'm leaning toward birth control and buying myself some more time.

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