The Poo Closet
When I was in high school my best friend (at the time), Jenni (Jen, now) and I would talk about how gross it was that her parents would poo in front of each other. It was 1994, the height of grunge, so you would have thought we would have been less squicked out by the whole thing, but, well, we were high maintenance girls back then. Actually, I shouldn’t speak for her, seeing as I haven’t talked to her much since high school. She may still find pooing in front of her partner the ‘most disgusting thing, ever!’ I, on the other hand, find it relatively necessary because I have to share a bathroom with my husband.
Well, and I lost all modesty after peering over my swollen belly to see my husband’s eyes staring in to the ever-widening cavern of my vagina as our child was trying to launch herself from my womb. Nothing says love like a tearing perineum!
At any rate, I think about the pooing thing, now, because we have one of those poo closets that face the standing shower. It is quite possible for me to reach out and shut the door, but, more often than not, I will leave the door WIDE open as I yell at him over the running water as he showers before we head to bed at night. I think about the girl that I was at sixteen, seventeen years old, and I feel sorry for her. I mean, she had no idea how awesome it would feel to be free enough to share your body functions with your spouse and know that he/she would still love you, stinky bottom and all.
Well, and I lost all modesty after peering over my swollen belly to see my husband’s eyes staring in to the ever-widening cavern of my vagina as our child was trying to launch herself from my womb. Nothing says love like a tearing perineum!
At any rate, I think about the pooing thing, now, because we have one of those poo closets that face the standing shower. It is quite possible for me to reach out and shut the door, but, more often than not, I will leave the door WIDE open as I yell at him over the running water as he showers before we head to bed at night. I think about the girl that I was at sixteen, seventeen years old, and I feel sorry for her. I mean, she had no idea how awesome it would feel to be free enough to share your body functions with your spouse and know that he/she would still love you, stinky bottom and all.
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