I am feelin' fine
I know that my plan of not working as a way of healing mentally is not something everyone can do, but it is totally working for me.
Friday Val and I went to a bachlorette party for my former co-worker, a girl we call Soko. I think it was fun. Val and I rocked the SingStar. I actually got some pretty high scores. That is the beauty of SingStar. I might have been drunk, but the game gives you a grade, so I can't pretend I was better, or worse, than I was because the grade is on the screen.
Saturday was a trip out to the Lake to celebrate Mike's 50th birthday party. It was fun. Adam and I bogarted the peddle boat so that I could fish in some peace and quiet. Mike's family is large and loud and when you mix beer with everything, you can hear the party across the lake. Yikes. He seemed like he was having a good time and that is all that matters. I like Mike. I always have. I wanted him to have a good time. Anything was better than me sitting around inadvertently making my mother mad because I exist and harshin' the mellow.
Adam and I floated on the lake, just talking. This gathering sort of drove home to me how much he and I have changed. We used to get to these things and separate, giving the other person the time and freedom to socialize without being up one another's rear ends. We didn't usually stay that long.
This time, it was rare that we were apart for long. He was still feeling sort of shell-shocked from me being gone on Friday. I think having me home all of the time will do him some good. Adam has some anxiety about losing me, still, and I don't want to make that worse for him.
Sunday we both shuffled around the house. Adam worked in the garage doing boy things and I cleaned the house. Well, part of the house. The housecleaning had gotten away from me and I have a way to go before I can relax about it.
This morning marked my first day of home alone-ness. Mom started a job today that I hope that she keeps. I would love to have lots of time to blast the radio while I clean, or write.
I feel better. I know that I am doing the right thing for my family by quitting. The coffee mines was dragging me down. There was just too much about the job that made me dislike myself and who I was becoming. I might find my peace, again. One can only hope.
Friday Val and I went to a bachlorette party for my former co-worker, a girl we call Soko. I think it was fun. Val and I rocked the SingStar. I actually got some pretty high scores. That is the beauty of SingStar. I might have been drunk, but the game gives you a grade, so I can't pretend I was better, or worse, than I was because the grade is on the screen.
Saturday was a trip out to the Lake to celebrate Mike's 50th birthday party. It was fun. Adam and I bogarted the peddle boat so that I could fish in some peace and quiet. Mike's family is large and loud and when you mix beer with everything, you can hear the party across the lake. Yikes. He seemed like he was having a good time and that is all that matters. I like Mike. I always have. I wanted him to have a good time. Anything was better than me sitting around inadvertently making my mother mad because I exist and harshin' the mellow.
Adam and I floated on the lake, just talking. This gathering sort of drove home to me how much he and I have changed. We used to get to these things and separate, giving the other person the time and freedom to socialize without being up one another's rear ends. We didn't usually stay that long.
This time, it was rare that we were apart for long. He was still feeling sort of shell-shocked from me being gone on Friday. I think having me home all of the time will do him some good. Adam has some anxiety about losing me, still, and I don't want to make that worse for him.
Sunday we both shuffled around the house. Adam worked in the garage doing boy things and I cleaned the house. Well, part of the house. The housecleaning had gotten away from me and I have a way to go before I can relax about it.
This morning marked my first day of home alone-ness. Mom started a job today that I hope that she keeps. I would love to have lots of time to blast the radio while I clean, or write.
I feel better. I know that I am doing the right thing for my family by quitting. The coffee mines was dragging me down. There was just too much about the job that made me dislike myself and who I was becoming. I might find my peace, again. One can only hope.
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